


It just ain't fair this thing called loving

by plikki



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Identity Reveal, It's another balcony scene!, It's obvious I don't know how to tag this, What do we have here?, but with a twist!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:08:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26423137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plikki/pseuds/plikki
Summary: Marinette finds Chat obviously feeling down. She wants to be there for him and what's the harm in talking about what's troubling him after all? More than what she could have expected.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 16
Kudos: 173





	It just ain't fair this thing called loving

**Author's Note:**

> Go listen to Conjure One - Tears from the moon. It's the reason for this fic. It's been in my head for a whole week and I finally gave up, but it's Saturday so it's ok. I was this close to making it an angsty piece to match the song completely, but I feel too tired as it is, I needed a happy ending. So here you are!

It was late but Marinette just couldn’t imagine falling asleep. There was a nervous energy inside her she couldn’t explain. Maybe some fresh air would help, she thought. But once she was out on her balcony, she heard strange noises. It was a good thing she hadn’t jumped straight into transforming if there was a risk of being caught doing it.

She looked around, but there was no one there. Then she heard a sniffle and what sounded like “Get a grip,” from behind her and she turned around. He wasn’t on her balcony, he was on the roof next to her house, but it was really Chat. And he didn’t sound alright. It was too late for her to pretend she hadn’t heard and seen him, she was already worried.

“Chat?” She asked gently. His head shot up, looking in the direction her voice had come from. “Are you ok?” 

“Marinette, I’m sorry if I disturbed you,” he said, not answering her question. She didn’t miss how he looked away, but she’d already seen his eyes shine in the moonlight. 

“You didn’t, I just got out for some fresh air and heard you. Do you want to come join me on my balcony, since I can’t come to you,” she said with a small laugh. She could, but he didn’t know that.

He hesitated, obviously not sure if he wanted her to see him in this state, and her heart went out to him. He looked so small and so incredibly fragile in that moment. She knew he didn’t have to be alone even if she couldn’t be there as his partner. He finally sighed and got up to jump over to her roof. 

“Has anything happened?” she probed. She ran through her day, thinking back to the last time she’d seen him. She couldn’t think of anything out of the ordinary. 

“Not really,” he said, shaking his head. “It’s just one of those days when it’s harder than usual.”

“You can tell me, if you want to.” In response to his hesitation, she added. “I said we can still be friends, right? You can tell me, even if it's about Ladybug,” she said, smiling for good measure, because she’d meant it as a joke and didn’t expect to see him wince. 

“It is about her?” The fact that he couldn’t meet her eye, spoke volumes. “Did she do anything?” She felt terror grip her heart. It was bad enough that she couldn’t think of anything out of the ordinary between them. What if she’d hurt him without realising it?

“No, no,” he said quickly. Then sighed again. “That’s what irks me the most. There is no reason at all. I just vacillate between being angry at myself and feeling plain old sad. I know I should give up on her and I swear I’m trying. But it’s not working. And it feels like I’m going in circles. I don’t want to make her feel uncomfortable, I don’t want my feelings to come in the way of our friendship, of our partnership. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something like this happened. So when another day passes and I’m still getting nowhere, I feel useless and hopeless and.. What you see right now,” he finished, shrugging. 

She hadn’t expected it would hurt this much, hearing him say this. She was the one who felt helpless. What could she even say to this?

“It’s not fair, you know," he continued. "How you fall in love with someone and you’re ready to give everything you have to this person, open yourself up completely to them, only for them not to feel the same way. It’s a bitter pill to swallow.”

“Tell me about it,” she mumbled under her breath before she could stop herself. But she had forgotten his keen hearing. 

“I’m sorry, that was very insensitive of me,” he said, regret written all over his face. 

“What?” She was confused for a second. “Oh. That wasn’t because of you.” It was his confused expression that stopped her in her tracks. “Ok, a tiny bit? I don’t want you to feel bad about it. It’s all in the past,” she said with an exaggerated laugh. He relaxed a little. “I get it. It also must be harder for you, what with secret identities and everything,” she added, not wanting to delve into her own broken heart. 

“Oh yes,” he said, smiling sadly. “That’s the other thing that drives me crazy. I’ve been so close to revealing my identity, on purpose, so many times. I want it so bad, it’s impossible to hold the words in sometimes. Maybe it won’t change a thing. But she’s the only person I’d trust with all of me and it hurts that I can’t.” Her heart really couldn’t take it. 

“It’s dangerous,” she whispered. It was such a hollow excuse, already so worn out, even to her ears.  
“I know. That’s why I have stopped asking her to let me do it. But I still want it. And..” He paused, looking embarrassed. “Sometimes I have this strange feeling. She looks at me in this way, like she’s trying to figure out something and then gets mad at herself for it.” 

Perceptive, she thought. Because this was driving her crazy at times too. All the things she’d seen and knew unwillingly were wreaking havoc in her heart but the fear was always stronger. Until now. She felt so tired all of a sudden. Of having to pretend, of talking about herself in the third person, of not being able to be there for him in the way she wanted to. She’d never wanted so bad to put an end to it all.

“What if it’s not just that?” She said quietly. “What if she knows something you don’t? What if she can’t stand the thought of having to fight with you again? Because you'd be the most formidable akuma, but don’t let this get to your head.” She didn’t pause to gauge his reaction. “It hurts so much that I know we were together and loved each other in that erased future. It was as if the mere possibility of that was taken out of my hands even before I knew I wanted it.” 

She couldn’t see through the tears in her eyes at this point, but she could feel a hand close around hers. She knew she’d said too much, that she couldn’t take it back. But it didn’t matter.

She blindly found her way into his arms and once he was holding her, let the tears fall. It wasn’t fair to him to tell him that. He was feeling so miserable as it was, this would only make it worse, she knew it. But she couldn’t help it. 

“I’m sorry,” she said when she could stop the tears for a little. 

“I’m sorry that you had to go through that and live with the memory of it,” he said. He didn’t ask for details, but she wasn’t sure if she could have given them. She just shrugged. 

“I actually find it even harder to believe that what you said happened, now that I know who you are. I mean, you always made it clear you were not interested in me like that, both me,” he said in response to the question in her eyes. But this only made it more confusing. “Yes, I know you lied that one time,” he said pointedly and she winced, “but I understand why. But other than that, you’ve always said that you’re just a fan,” he said with a rueful smile. 

Her mind screeched to a halt. It couldn’t be. 

“Ha,” she laughed and the sound was a little hysterical to her ears. “Oh my God. Adrien?” She had to know for sure. He just nodded, looking resigned. 

“Mystery solved then,” she said, shaking her head in wonder. 

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“It means that I’ve always been in love with you,” she said, the truth finally breaking free from her. “Yes, I know I had a strange way of showing it. But that future now makes so much sense.” 

He was looking at her wide-eyed. 

“Wow.” 

“Yes, wow,” she agreed with a sigh.

“What now?” He asked after a minute of silence. What was the answer to that? They’d done it all wrong. Marinette all but expected Bunnyx to jump out of a portal in the sky and drag her somewhere to fix the damage. But it didn’t happen. Could this mean that there wouldn’t be an apocalyptic future because of their carelessness? 

“I guess we’ll have to wait and see. It doesn’t look so bad for now,” she said with a smile as she snuggled into him. She heard a purr rumble in his chest and giggled. But when she looked up, he looked embarrassed. 

“It’s cute, don’t feel bad about it.”  
“I can’t really control it, so I’m glad you don't mind,” he said, his lips curving into a smile. Marinette gulped as her eyes focused there. 

“You can say it,” she heard him say and he was really smiling then. Almost smirking, she realised with a jolt. She wasn't going to give that cat the satisfaction of hearing her say out loud that she wanted to kiss him! Instead she decided to just do it. 

With her lips already on his and feeling his arms tighten around her, she thought that this wasn’t likely to make him feel less smug about the whole situation. But she didn’t mind. Not one bit. 

**Author's Note:**

> Seriously, though, how do I tag my own brand of "nothing really happens, they just talk and end up kissing"? :facepalm:


End file.
